Dissociation

This old identity that still tries to objectify itself into my present life. The fading memories that intuitively come and go.

I don’t understand why, I just want to tell my throw away soul to stop trying to force its’ way into my life.

I am done living a lie continuing to lead and pursue that old life.

Wasted and broken dreams, stitches all up the seams of her torn dress. Smeared mascara from yesterdays tears. Bottles and empty bags of dope. The last hit of a dewby.

No more crying time to grow up and be a big girl and face my fears.

Wide awake, faucet water tastes of old, dirty sewage pipes and the moonlight coming through the drapes of the window shine on my tired and weary eyes.

I am not surprised you left me and ran away from me as, soon as I opened my mouth.

Just a broken and lonely princess you filled her up with your internal fear and doubts.

Now left to detach and dissociate myself from the toxic energy.

I am done allowing emotional vampires like you in to suck me to dry and wear me thin.

Goodbye poison. Goodbye weakling. Goodbye to all my sins.

 

 

Temptation

Just one more glass with ice full of dark whiskey sliding across the wooden
table. Don’t watch what I do. Watch what I say. Marking all up her arms. Bruises all over her legs.

Just another hit off the glass pipe spinning around casting spells with it’s white ghost.

The media tells us do it so. So we do what we do. Only used to numbing myself. So you can’t save me. I let the drink and ice save me. Living in a city so
crowded, full of clowns, thieves, hookers and green leaves loaded in the peace pipe. You know we got it. So thank god for the cure.

What’s the use in abstinence. Just one more dance with the devil. Is this my last wish?
Riding the wings into the deep pestilence of darkness.
We ride into the darkness, marching leaving us starved with the devils last wish.
There is no saving her.
Bruises all over,
chalked up the pavement with my steps.
Where I breathe in ciggerates and exhale the excess smoke.
In the dark, is where I learn the most.
To learn how to survive and and the easiest way to cope.
The devils last wish, my lips kiss the pipe full of dope.
Ashes full down into the tray.

Welcome to the world of temptation. Congratulations your bad habits
are welcome here. Leave fear and guilt at the door.

Once, you leave you’ll be left with your demons.
Be careful the devils last wish maybe, you staying forever
giving into all your bad habits loosing your soul and never leaving.

Ask yourself what really matters? Life, death, bad habits or temptation?